Your hugs heal people. But it comes with a cost. It decreases your own lifespan by 5%. Only the the richest of the rich come to see you. You have cured clients with cancer, aids, incurable diseases and more. However, those poor children dying in the hospital, the urge to help them eats you alive. You are getting depressed as you can’t stand this injustice any longer. You set out to visit a hospital for children with terminal illnesses. You write two words on a piece of cardboard: FREE HUGS

Okay, so let’s assume that each time you hug someone your life span gets decreased by 5% of what’s left (meaning if you’re 50 and have 100 year’s total to love, those 5% would only be 2.5 years. Furthermore, after that you’re only supposed to get 97.5 years old anymore, so when your lifespan decreases by further 5%, it’s only 2.375 years your life gets shortened by – which is 5% of the 47.5 years you have left).

In that case you would, contrary to what many assume here, be able to give more than twenty hugs.

Now, let’s furthermore assume that you were 16 when you first did that – let’s say by accident. At this point you where supposed to get 100 years old.

The next time you did this was when you where 18 years old. After that, you started doing it for money – According to the text it should be at least 5 times – one time cancer, one time aids, “incurable diseases” is a plural, so that’s two, and “more” means at least one more. So let’s be generous and say you did this 7 times total.

Now, I’m assuming “richest of the rich” means at least Top 100.

According to this page that’d be Aliko Dangote, with a fortune of $14.1 Billion. So, as we’re assuming he’s the last one who can afford you – and people would be willing to pay a lot for something like this, let’s put the price for one hug at $7 billion.

Now, according to this site here living in San Francisco costs an average of $1114 per month. But you get a lot of money. So let’s say you need $5000 a month. That’d mean you get along for 116,666.66666… years.

And that’s assuming those people are only willing to sent half their fortune to save their lives, and you need more than four times the money of an average citizen of San Francisco to get by, which I doubt.

But okay, let’s assume you need new money every two years for one reason or another.

And we said you give seven hugs for money, minus the one you have at sixteen.

After the hug at 16, you would still be supposed to get 95.8 years old.

At 18, you therefore would have 77.8 years left.

Now, we said 7 hugs, every two years. At the end of those 14 years, you would still be supposed to get roughly 76.26 years old. That gives you 44.26 more years.

Now let’s say another year passes before you decide you’ve had enough. 43.26 years left.

And let’s say one hug lasts for ten second, and it takes fifty seconds for someone new to appear and hug you. That’d 40s per hug, or rather 0.000001902588 … Years.

By the time you would be below 20 years to live, at 19.0398572624416057301619011187264404296875 to be exact, you would have hugged 17 people.

It’s getting really tiresome to put all of this into my phone calculator, though, so I’ll write an algorithm to do the actual calculations for me tomorrow and then tell you exactly how many kids you can hug until you fall down dead.


I’m also pretty sure I made a typo while putting this in. Again, I’ll look into it tomorrow

I was going to reblog a story, but wow! You would at least be able to give 100+ hugs if you take it slow. Eventually you will have an hour or so left to live and one hug would only decrease your remaining lifespan by three minutes.